Small steps to caring for yourself when life feels overwhelming


Dear Reader,

Sometimes I have an easier time looking after others before myself. Maybe it's the values I was raised with, but while looking after others feels like an act of kindness, self-care can feel... well, selfish.

Setting boundaries, taking time to do something for myself, etc. these things didn't always come naturally to me.

But one idea that's really helped me is thinking of my future self as someone else who also needs my help.

Future you deserves your present care.

Looking after your 'future self'

Self-care isn’t just about bubble baths, massages, or treating yourself to something special. In fact, the most helpful form of self-care is the kind of care a loving spouse gives their partner or a parent gives their child:

  • Choosing an outfit for the next day, to make the morning easier
  • Tidying up the kitchen, so you don't wake up to a sink full of dirty dishes
  • Starting a load of laundry to make it more manageable
  • Creating a workout playlist so you have something to look forward to for your gym session later
  • Making plans to do something fun or relaxing at the end of a day that you anticipate will be difficult

We can keep it simple, with 3-5 minute little gestures of "Hey, I did this because I knew it'd make your life easier."

When it comes to taking care of ourselves, it's easy to put ourselves at the bottom of the priority list. And when we don't, we blame ourselves for lacking in 'self-discipline'.

But there's no need to be so harsh with ourselves, we can do it from a place of love and kindness. We can keep it simple, without any goal or judgment, but just the thought of doing something kind for our future self.

Finally, remember to express gratitude towards yourself

For this to work, don't forget to thank your past self.

When we feel obligated or expected to do something without any gratitude, we lose motivation to do it again. But when our actions are met with gratitude, we feel appreciated and we'll want to do it again.

This applies to ourselves as well.

  1. Think about a future need
  2. Do a small task, even just 3-5 minutes, that can help you in the future
  3. Express gratitude, let yourself feel loved

So remember to thank that past version of yourself for folding the laundry, doing their homework, or taking out the trash.

Let yourself feel gratitude that they did something kind, keeping you in mind because they wanted your day to be easier. It's a wonderful feeling to be so loved (even by yourself).

Future you deserves your present care.

Warmly,

Kaki


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Hi, I'm Kaki!

I teach about health inspired by simple Japanese philosophies and lifestyle practices, so you can learn to find peace, fulfillment, strength, and health in your own body. Sign up for my newsletter to receive all my writing and exclusive resources!

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